First of all, I am a lover of all animals!
I love watching wildlife, and seeing things in their natural habitat..... awww how sweet right.
NOT
Dear Mr. Deer who is 10 times bigger than me:
Just because I have an apple tree in my yard, and that I have soooo graciously allowed you to eat from previously doesn't mean that you have to bring the whole 'Deers for Apples Society' to my house for your annual gathering..... there are catering services for that :)
Just for the record, its okay to eat some of my apples, I'm not Greedy like you, but when I walk out of my house at 1:03 a.m. to find my missing pack of Marlboro's I expect you to run away.... QUICKLY.
Its not necessary for you to square off toward me and think you can charge at me because I am invading your secret society. Its not your tree, I would like some apples, I have Gliders, they love apples, my son loves apples.... we all like them. Between your social gatherings, and the damn birds, I swear I am not going to have any apples.
In Conclusion.....Mr. Deer, I do own a gun, and am very good with it, so my best advice to you to keep those precious antlers of yours is to be nice to occupant of the property, and it will be reciprocated. Otherwise, I will be forced to take action against you, and I don't mean in a court of law buddy!
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